Since moving to Oklahoma, I have begun to wonder about the decisions Austin and I have made. Think about it: every day you make decisions that determine the outcome for the rest of your life. It was a big decision to move to OK and one that we have never thought about lightly. But what about the everyday decisions, like what to have for breakfast, or what car to drive into the city? Do those minute choices really have an effect on my life years from now? Essentially, yes. This is something that I have come to realize within the last few weeks. For example, eating poorly during breakfast breeds poor eating habits and, ultimately, poor nutrition for the future. Deciding to drive the gas-guzzling SUV into the city results in more money going towards gasoline purchases, resulting in less money going into savings that month. These seemingly meaningless and mundane decisions can make a significant impact on our lives in the coming months and years. If mundane decisions such as these can make an impact, what about huge decisions such as moving to Oklahoma? What kind of impact will that make? Admittedly, a large one. When we started this adventure, I had no idea.
Which is why I have started this blog. Change is hard for me to accept. I am a creature of habit. I like things to stay exactly the way they are because whichever way I enjoy doing things is, obviously, the best and most efficient. :) When we were discussing our move out here I had no idea about how much it would alter our daily lives. However, every aspect of our life has been uprooted and changed. Former Sarah would freak out and demand that things be righted. Contemporary Sarah is optimistic, even hopeful. Right now, neither of us have a job, or a home. Our belongings are scattered throughout Austin's parents house. Normally, I would have pulled my hair out by now (and I've been tempted). But all of this change has caused me to appreciate the simple things. Things like learning how to hang out with Austin outside of the daily routine of a few words exchanged before work and strained, tired conversation following a long day. We've had to relearn how to hang out with each other. We've had to spend all day together for the last month. I took his company for granted.
I questioned our decision to move here. I questioned our ability to get through this stressful time together with our marriage intact. I did all of this questioning before we had even made the 13-hour drive to get here. I hadn't even gotten here yet and I was already freaking out! That was my mindset in coming here. It's been rough, and we've been tested. But through it all, I truly believe we are becoming closer as a couple. We've had to lean on each other for support every step of the way. And since we've gotten here, I have not once wished we were back home. I want to be wherever Austin is. And right now, that is in Chickasha, Oklahoma.
Our decision to come out here was scary. Neither of us had any idea about how this situation would turn out. We still have no idea. I do know, however, that I would not trade this experience for anything in the world. Whether a simple choice such as what to wear, or a large decision such as where to live, the choice we make has a significant impact on our life regardless of our ability to realize the ramifications.
As Austin assured me the night before we left Birmingham, "We aren't writing a new book, just a new chapter." I hope this gives our Birmingham friends some comfort. You are still very much a part of the novella of our life.
This blog will, hopefully, serve a few purposes: 1) to update our Birmingham friends on our goings-on; 2) to allow me an outlet with which I can sort out my many, complicated thoughts during this crazy time; and 3) to keep a record of this exciting and new experience. My entries will not always be this deep, but I've had a few days to mull this one over. I'm excited and a little nervous about what the future holds, but I am encouraged that this path was paved for me long before I was born. There's a larger plan in play right now and that's comforting.
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